Speechless

From time to time, my mom reminds me that, as a child, I talked incessantly. It could be because I have broken that habit (maybe even to a fault!) and my thoughts often remain just that: thoughts; not words. Or it might be due to the fact that I have chosen a wife who, on average, speaks more words each day than I do. So, when we discuss which gene pool my daughter swims in as the words continue to pour out of her mouth, my mother reminds me that she might just come by it honestly!

It's odd, when you think of it. People who know me would not define me as a talker, except of course, mom. Curiously, the first time people hear me preach, I often hear from them that it seems so out of character for me. But then, it's down there somewhere obviously.

It raises the whole Nature-Nurture question. How much of who I am is due to genetics; and how much of who I am is as a result of my context or experiences? And, if God created me a certain way, and I am not living that way, how much do I work to unlock whom he has created me to be?

I think that second question is where I'm struggling. Because I believe that God didn't create me in a vaccuum. He created me the way he wanted me to be and placed me in experiences that he wanted for me and all that has shaped who I am. And I have been happy with that. Happy, at least, until the last week or so.

See, I guess what I'm slowly coming to realize is, while God placed me in a context and gave me certain experiences, his purpose for those experiences wasn't for me to become someone different than he created me to become. If I have let things stand in the way of being whom I was made to be, I need to change what I'm doing to become who I am.

And that's what we all need to do. We all have areas in our lives that have prevented us from being the people God has designed. The Bible uses the word 'repent', which simply means to have a change of heart. We need to have a change of heart with regard to the stuff that we have allowed to stand in our way.

Of course, all this talk of talking has been heightened by the fact that I got laryngitis this week!

...but I won't allow that experience to shape my future!